Riding Ponies

Ruthie has had her first school friend birthday party.  I knew she would be a social butterfly, but it warms my heart that she has found another close friend.  She loves her Anna very much and everyone at school knows they are best friends, but it is nice that they are branching out and making other friends as well.

The little girl’s dad has connections and we were able to go horseback riding at a near by camp!  Despite a minor incident with Zaccheus, Ruthie has not stopped talking about horses!   She loved it!  She giggled with glee as she trotted around the arena!

waiting for instructions

She looked so little up on those big horses!

Mike and I were so proud of her!

She did not even think twice about us hoisting her up there!

Caught while trotting

This is the horse she got thrown from!

Thankfully, it was the miniature horse and not too far off the ground!  We were proud of her, She didn’t cry at all.  She got right back up on one of the big horses and rode off!  I think the man leading the horse was more shook up than Ruthie!

What a fun day we had watching our little girl be such a big girl!

Hard to believe she will be 5 in less than 2 months!

Tree Hunt 2011

It is what we do.  It is a tradition.  No matter how cold.  No matter how snowy, rainy, nasty.  We bundle up.  We ride in a wagon that is made of wood.  We bump up and down on a dirt road that leads to a forest of trees.  Evergreen trees.  In that field is all our hopes and dreams of finding the most perfect imperfect tree to cut down and place in our living room.  The memories are etched in my head.  I have gone since I was little.  My dad and brother used to get annoyed and bored of my mom, sister, and I hunting for the perfect imperfect tree.   When Mike and I started dating he soon learned that this would be one tradition I would fight to keep going.  He quickly understood the frustrations of my brother and father!  You see that perfect imperfect tree had to be decided by all 3 of us females.

The tree couldn’t be too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat, shaped – but not perfectly shaped so as to not have character, needed to have sturdy branches for heavy ornaments, and holes – but not too many.  The perfect imperfect tree.  I remember one year, every tree we found was too perfect for my mom..so after hours, I do mean hours..we headed back up the hill to come back another day, after all it was getting dark.  The owner looked puzzled.  “You didn’t find anything?”  My mom smiled and said “your trees are too perfect”.  He laughed and told us there were some trees that didn’t pass the perfect test and were going to be cut down and burned at the end of the season if we wanted to take a look, said we could have it for $10 if we found one worthy of our hearts.  We went and about half hour later we had our perfect imperfect tree!  (I don’t think he thought we would find one!!)

We didn’t care how long it took us, we didn’t care how snowy it was.  We didn’t care if we were numb from our toes to nose.  The perfect imperfect tree was worth the hunt!  We would take hours.  I do mean hours!  We would mark the trees with gloves, hats, scarfs, and men.  The men typically annoyed would say I am not moving till you decide!  So markers they became.  Once we found the one we then had to find dad, cut it down, then search for all our accessories.  Pretty sure a few years we didn’t find everything!!

The tradition has continued.  It doesn’t take nearly as long, maybe when Ruthie is older she will have more of an opinion..but for now we go, we hunt, we find, we cut.  All done it 2 hours tops!  It is a fun time.  Makes for great memories.  I love it.  Ruthie loves it.  I think Mike tolerates it!   This year we took Cassie and James with us.

 

 

 

It was not horribly cold, rainy, or snowy this year, but we still had fun.

 

 

 

 

 

Our tree was found in the first 10 minutes, but of course we had to walk all the way down each row, just to make sure it is the was infact the one.   Mike was proud that he was the one that found.  He was also very happy it only took us 1 hour

 

 

 

 

 

 

After the great find we head back to the lodge for popcorn and hot chocolate.  I think it is what keeps the kids happy!!

 

 

 

 

Once home we set it up and then typically everyone goes to bed, but because it only took us an hour we had plenty of time and it was such a fun day,  I let the kids and Mike help me decorate it!  We put on some Christmas music, strung the lights, went out and bought more lights, wrapped the garland around and hung the ornaments.

   Lastly, Mike helped Ruthie place the angel on top.Completion.  Our perfect imperfect Christmas tree.These are the memories that will last a lifetime for Ruthie.  I am overwhelmed by the blessings I have in this moment.  Makes the world seems still.  Makes the struggles of daily life worth it.  Makes the internal struggle non-existent.  In the realm of what could be, I am so overly blessed with what God has given me and entrusted in my care!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas

Our Christmas Newsletter this year..

 Merry Christmas
Wow, I cannot believe it is time to write one of these again!!

I have fully decided that the first 3 days of any new year should be skipped!  On January 3rd, Mike was unexpectedly laid off without severance, effective immediately.  It was surly not the way I wanted to start off the new year!!  With mike being 90% of our income, we had no idea what we were going to do!  We knew that the company RED BULL was opening a new warehouse in Solon. (before he simply worked for a distributor that distributed the product).  After 3 looong weeks of not having any idea if they were going to pick him up or not we finally got the call.  What. A. Relief.  He would start the first week in February!  We have many friends who have gone a year plus before landing the next job.  During the layoff, Mike and I learned a lot about our marriage.  We saw it’s strengths and felt it’s weaknesses.  God saw us through each day and for that we are grateful!

So in February, Mike went to work for RED BULL North America.  A company that is NOTHING like the distributor company!  His day starts early, but he gets home waay before dinner time! In November, he won the “Bull of the Month.”  He continually makes his family proud of him!!

Also in February we took a trip to Disney World.  Ruthie turned 4 on Valentines Day and we had been debating and mulling over the decision for awhile.  It was totally a God thing to book the trip 2 weeks before the layoff.  Had we waited till the New Year we would not have gone!  It was a blast and Ruthie was in awe most of the week!  My sister, Heather, was still home from Cambodia so she also went with us.  She was the serious planner!  We would have probably missed out on a lot if she hadn’t done all the research and planning!!

Ruthie’s 1st accomplishment of the summer was pumping her legs on the swing!  Boy, was I happy about this one!  The summer was full of friends, swimming, friends, and more swimming!  Now that it is cold out she is still wanting to swim!!

We also took our first trip to Chicago as a family.  Extended family was gracious enough to put us up for the weekend and be our personal guide tour!  Mike, of course, was very happy to fulfill a life long dream of his…to watch a game at Wrigley Field.  He was like a kid in a candy store that day!  I personally couldn’t tell you if they won or lost that day!

 

 

 

 
In August, Mike’s company had a picnic at Cedar Point.  My little brother ad sister worked very hard all summer and were able to go with us.  It was the first time for all three kids!  It was a different experience for Mike and I ~ the day was no longer about us and our fun, it was about the kids and their fun.  It was a great family day!!

I continue to work from home watching 4 wonderful children plus Ruthie.  I have two 4 days a week and then the sibling group I typically have 2x a week.  I still love it!  I am completely overjoyed that people are willing to pay me to stay in my comfy clothes, not do my hair or make-up, and play all day!  It is seriously the best gig ever!!

September did bring some changes in our schedule, Ruthie started preschool 3 mornings a week.  Mike was able to take the day off and we made it a family event!  She absolutely loves school!  She is doing wonderful and making a lot of new friends!  I have learned to adjust my mornings and we are liking the new schedule…although the snow has yet to fly when I write this…we will see on those cold snowy mornings when I have to dig out my van out just how much I like it!!

My day off falls on one of Ruthie’s school days, so I was really looking forward to having that morning to myself.  That was my plan.  God’s plan was for me to go do office work for a friend 4 hours in the morning.  I have NEVER worked in an “office” environment.  At first it was a challenge, but now I am enjoying it very much!!  It gets me out of the house and away from kids.  It allows Ruthie to go to her best friends house after school.  It gives extra money that is not budgeted every month.  Overall, it has been a nice 4 hour job!

I turned the dreaded 30 this year.  Mike and many of closets friends spoiled me rotten that day!  I am not at all where I thought I would be when I turned 30, but I am right where God wants me!  So I am learning to accept it and trust Him even more!

We hope and pray that all of you are doing well.  We hope that you have a very Merry Christmas.  May we all be reminded of what Christmas really is all about.  We pray that 2012 will be everything you hope for
and more!!

Love,
Mike, Sarah & Ruthie

Merry Christmas Virtual World!  Thank you for listening to my heart throughout the year!  Thank you for the prayers and support through it all!

Slippery Slope

Have you ever tried climbing up a muddy hill in the pouring down rain?  I imagine it would not be fun.  I imagine it would be frustrating and overwhelming.  I imagine it would suck.  I imagine it would feel kind of like how feel today….

It is how I have felt a lot over this past year.  I feel like I am at the bottom of the deepest, muddiest hill.  Days of sunshine allow me to climb out but then I get knocked back down by an unexpected storm.

I  felt the storm welling up but I had no idea how to avoid it and there is nothing to grab on to  keep from slipping.  I hoped this storm would blow by and not ground me once again.  I had hoped I was strong enough and had gained some ground.  Apparently, I was wrong.  A pity party for one has entered my heart and pretty much stayed there all day.  I don’t know how to stop it.

A few weeks ago, the pastor talked about spiritual attacks and how we are to identify the lie and insert the truth.   It’s not that I cannot tell the difference between the lie.  But…the truth is not what I want to hear.   The truth doesn’t make the ache go away.  The truth for me does not make everyone butt out of my life.  The truth..

The truth is I have given up on getting pregnant.  The truth is most days I have come to be fine with this idea.  The truth is some days I think I would go crazy if we had another baby.   The truth is I want another child.  The truth is our house is too small for us to be allowed to adopt.  The truth is we have too much debt to get out of this house and move somewhere bigger. The truth is I am down right angry that God allows some people to get pregnant..like crack addicts, teenagers..

How is a body fearfully and wonderfully made when it doesn’t produce babies?

I love decorating for Christmas.  I especially love my fireplace..the stockings that hang.  Two red.  One pink.  This year those stockings are mocking me.  I keep thinking there should be one more.  Blue or pink.  At this point I wouldn’t care!  This year Satan has taken the joy and I have allowed him.  That is what sucks…I HAVE ALLOWED HIM!    He has used other people to say mean things.  Some say stuff that possibly would be helpful, but just aren’t.  He has got a tight grip on me this week and I don’t have the energy to fight him off.

And that is what it comes down to..Truth be told, it could be different, but I would have the same feelings about something else. When everything else falls away and the excuses stop..I am left with a broken relationship with the One that has Created me.  That is what it boils down to.

Contentment is not based on a change in my circumstances, rather it is based on a change in me. The willingness to embrace God’s choices.

                                    ~Nancy Leigh DeMoss

God is enough.  Period.  Not God is enough plus another baby.

God is enough.  Period.  Not God is enough plus more money..a bigger house.. 

God is enough.

At least He should be.  That is the goal.  So up the hill we go again, one slippery step at a time.